You smell like stripper and shame
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
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