i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
i went to go through my sent box of drunk texts from last night and they were all deleted... i'm going to assume drunk me made the executive decision that sober me would be better off not knowing what they said
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
I got inside last night via doggy door
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
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