Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
He told me they were just razor bumps!
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
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