you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
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i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
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As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
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