My hair reeks of homosexuality.
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
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