goodnight i made you a song goodbye
I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
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