I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
Randomize