Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
Randomize
