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• (540): View more from Virginia

  new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.

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• (978): View more from Massachusetts

  is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?

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• (304): View more from West Virginia

  I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous

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• (714): View more from California

  Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.

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  Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (785): View more from Kansas

  Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.

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• (773): View more from Illinois

  Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.

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• (201): View more from New Jersey

  I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet

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• (513): View more from Ohio

  Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup

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• (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.

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  21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (778): View more from British Columbia

  Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.

  (604): View more from British Columbia

  I go down on you because abs

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• (314): View more from Missouri

  I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly

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• (920): View more from Wisconsin

  We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".

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• (903): View more from Texas

  The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night

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• (360): View more from Washington

  No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!

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• (620): View more from Kansas

  I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters

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