I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
Things you owe me: a sober apology, $12, the removal of bbq sauce from my doorknob
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
I can feel your judgement through the phone
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Randomize
