I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
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