Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
Randomize
