everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
Your message has been received by an unknown user. Picture verification required.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
Randomize
