Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
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