I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
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