Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize
