I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
I woke up with my phone plugged into an extension cord in my garage. No clue how I got home. Videos of me flogging my roommate with my set of keys telling him he's the worst roommate ever. And my mom woke me up at 8am asking how to make a DVD...Goddamnit first Friday.
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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