after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
I just found puke in my bra..
Pretty sure I just became the first person ever to use the word "boner" in a wedding card...
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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