I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
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How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
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A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
I bet he’d be surprised by the epic blow job he’d get if he stopped talking about his wife long enough for me to get in the mood
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