So drunk, too bad you don't want this
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
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