i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
i dont even know how to be here
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
Randomize
