You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
Randomize
