I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
i just told my mom tuesday boozeday rhymes so that she can remember not to text or call me on wednesday mornings
youre going to kill that woman one of these days
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
Randomize
