is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
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