she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
