and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
Randomize
