eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
Randomize
