at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to make out with him forever
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
Randomize