I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
