weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
This can only be settled by a dance off.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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