I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
I wanna get so fucked up that I try to catch a coyote in a pillowcase, breakdance fight a lion, and send back some toast at Denny's when I see its slightly burnt.
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
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