Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
Where is the baby squirrel I found last night?! I've looked all morning I can't find Morris anywhere did someone take him?? ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
Honey, I kept trying to tell you it was just a pine cone.
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sundayâ€
Randomize
