My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
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