i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
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