So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
Randomize
