It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize
