it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Randomize
