tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
Randomize