I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
Randomize
