guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
God, I missed his penis.
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