Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Vodka?
Forever.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
Randomize