How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
