Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school...
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
bring money and cleavage
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Randomize
