drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
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