At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have fence marks all over my body
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
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