Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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