my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
The only birthday messages I got from men were from my 8th grade boyfriend and the bouncer at our bar. I think I'm doing something wrong in life.
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
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