Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
MY TWIN SISTER IS ENGAGED. I REPEAT, MY SCREW UP OF A SISTER IS ENGAGED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'll be there in 20 with vodka.
You're a waste of cheezeits
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
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