There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Randomize
