We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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