dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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